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April, 1997

My cousin asked me if she and her boyfriend could stay in my apartment when they come to New York. She and I are close. But they are both smokers and I don't allow smoking in my apartment. Should I tell her she can't stay? There are no other relatives to stay with in town. What should I do?

Sounds like you want her to stay, but you don't allow smoking. So what's the problem? Just tell her, "I'd love to have you and your boyfriend. There's just one rule: no smoking in the apartment. You're welcome to smoke outside/in the hall/on the fire escape/wherever."

But they're not married. What are you going to do about that?

What's the problem? They can do it outside, in the hall, on the fire escape, wherever!

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